"My Mom is My Hero"

Today I have asked my student - an 8th grader young boy - to write an essay about his family. After he finished, I asked him to read it loudly. As he came to the part about his mother, it has fascinated me: He said: My mom is my hero.

It fascinated and touched me at the same time. It fascinated me that a 13 years old boy even says that his mother is his hero. It touched me more because this 13 years old young boy is a kind of boy, who seems not to care about anything. Like mostly other teen boys in his age, he is careless, he has nothing in his mind but skating and dancing. He is clumsy and he likes to tease his little sister. He also sometime makes some problems at school.

My mother is my hero. How many kids can openly say that? How many kids say and mean it truly?

I think deep down inside our heart, we all must admit that our mother really are our first hero. Especially if you are a mother yourself, you would know that being a mother really need a hero quality with super power!

But still, we must also remember that nobody's perfect. Even moms are not perfect. They too sometimes make mistake. They too sometimes have bad days.

As a son/daughter just appreciate your mom, forgive and learn from their mistake. Be proud and love them whatever they do. Remind them if they are forgetting something. Explain if there are missunderstanding.

And if you are a mother, remember that the joy, pain, happiness and all the feeling you feel now are exactly what your mother had with you once... Or still...

Finding Out Friendship

Once, I took every friendship very seriously. For me "good friend" is very important and being with them all the time is a must. I often felt left behind and forgotten, if I miss any event with them. That was in my teenager time.

Later on, friends were being a family. Understandable, if you were all by youself in a foreign country and had to struggle to survive. Friends were the only things you have to hold on, to share and to stand by each other.

Lately, the amount of "good friends" are reduced to some "best friends" I could count with both hand's fingers. They are friends, who really are always be with me, stands by me in my good and bad times, who knows me perfectly better and worse. Them, I can tell anything, talk about everything. Some of them I already knew my whole life, some I've just met. I am always thankful for having them. As one quote says: God sent every of us an angel, and we call them "friend". They are for me: Angels.

Now, the "best friends" are selected as well. It's not that I am forgetting nor leaving them, but as the priority in live has changed, so is the choice of "friends". I now choose friends with benefits only. Benefits means that they are sharing the same purpose in life have the same thoughts and the most important thing: have the same priority. It is now about growing together and be strong together.

Friends to have fun with are nice to have, but friends to have success with is more important to have.

Family Ties

Sometimes, it is cheerless moments that bring family together.

My father in law passed away 10 days ago. Exactly on February 28th 2014 in the age of 80. The family from my husband's site is really is a big family. Moreover, they come from all part of Indonesia. It is a kind of multicultural family they have.

I myself know only a few from them. Mostly only the main family member: brothers, sisters, cousins and in-laws.

My father in law came from Flores, an island in eastern Indonesia, from the city of Manggarai. There are many Manggarai people live in Surabaya. They have a very strong community and bounds. By the memorial and funereal you can see, how strong the "family-boundaries" between the "island-people" are

It amazed me somehow, that this kind of strong relationship still exist. They really help with heart, no string attached.

Here I saw that family is beyond bloodlines. That sometime you could find the "real family" outside the lines.

To Love Correctly

Everytime I have a new student, I always feel like I was at my first day at school: excited, a bit nervous and kind of afraid.

New student means new challenge. And the challenge comes not only from the student itself but mostly also from the parents.

Some parents think, that hiring a tutor/private teacher means giving up the responsibility as well. Some parents don't even bother to have a short look in the kid's school book or schedule. But as soon as the kids failed, there is someone else to blame: the (private) teacher.

Other parents just admire their kids too much - and in a wrong way of admiring. The kids are always right. Whatever they say or do, it is the command.

You should love your kids, not spoiling them. Loving them correctly means you have to let them swallow the bitter pills, if they have to, to make them better. Nobody is getting healthy only from sweets and candies. If we're not starting early with the rules, when should it be? If it's already too late?